Confetti
by JaffaCakeMuncher
Summary: What happens when House accompanies Cameron to a family gathering? Will it just be a weekend of sarcasm, or will something unexpected develop? This is my very first fanfic, so please be gentle!
1. Sweetie Pie!

**Confetti – A HouseCameron Fanfic**

**Chapter one - The Invitation **

It all started the day when the letter arrived, from _that_ sister.

Two doctors sat at a table in Princeton Plainsborough Hospital. One was sorting through a pile of mail while the other played on a Nintendo DS, ridding the world of evil one zombie at a time.

Dr Allison Cameron let out a barely audible sigh as she read the contents of her letter.

Dr Greg House, who was a man of impeccable hearing, raised his eyebrows and put his game down.

"Something wrong, Cameron? I'm not getting sued again, am I? Mind you, it has been a while since my last court hearing, it'd be nice to catch up with Judge Judy. Who is it this time? Cos if it's that guy with the leg, you know I didn't mean to-"

"It's nothing to do with you, House," Cameron interrupted with exasperation, cutting him off mid-rant.

"No? Who is it about then?"

Cameron sighed again. She passed him the letter.

"It's my little sister, Amy. She's getting married next month." Agitatedly she tapped her pen against her mug.

"So? Why should that bother you so much?" asked House with unconcealed interest as he read the contents of her letter.

"Just wait 'til you get to the last paragraph," she said wryly.

House read on, choosing to read the last paragraph aloud.

"'I just can't believe how lucky I am, Allison! Craig is just SO amazing, he treats me like a princess. I'm so proud to be able to give mom and dad the son-in-law they've always wanted. I mean, I know you tried sweetie-pie' –"

House stopped momentarily. "Sweetie-pie?! You cannot be serious!"

Cameron rolled her eyes. "She calls me that all the time."

Shaking his head, House returned to the letter.

"'I know you tried sweetie-pie, but your marriage wasn't exactly a success. He was dead within a month of the wedding. At least I'm giving them a son-in-law who's going to provide for his wife, maybe give them a couple of grandkids. Your husband was never really part of the family, but the folks adore Craig! They never told you Allie, but your marriage was a huge disappointment to them. Never mind though – my marriage will make up for your mistake! I do hope you find a nice man to bring – if not, I'll gladly set you up with someone! What are sisters for? Anyway, must go! See you at the wedding sweetie!'"

House looked across at his immunologist with disbelief.

"That's some sister you've got there, Cameron. I mean, Jesus!"

Cameron laughed at the indignation on her boss's face. Just having him on her side cheered her up.

"She's always been like that. She's about as subtle as a nuclear bomb, and just as destructive. You wouldn't believe how many people I've had to apologise to on her behalf over the years."

House fixed his eyes on hers. "Oh, I can believe it alright. What I can't believe is the way she spoke to you. All that stuff about your husband, and your parents, and- "

"It's true," Cameron said simply.

Rage for Cameron's sister flowed through House swiftly. He didn't know why he cared, but he hated the way Amy had quite clearly warped her sister's mind.

"Cameron, don't be stupid. How could anyone be disappointed in you for what you did? Your sister's just being a spoilt, pathetic little bi-"

"That's just her way," Cameron interrupted. "She loves to put me down in any way possible, but it doesn't mean what she says isn't true. My parents cared for Paul, but they couldn't understand why I would willingly marry a dying man. To them, my marriage _was_ a failure."

Though she tried to hide it, Cameron's voice gave a little hitch.

"And I don't have anyone to take to the wedding, which means I'll have to endure the snide comments and whispers of my sister and her friends about my crappy social life. She'll set me up with someone truly awful, no doubt a leering, sweaty, distant cousin. Then I'll have to watch her and Craig play the happy couple all day, with everyone saying 'never mind, it'll be your turn next!', until Amy reminds them all that I already tried marriage and what a disaster it was, and..."

Cameron pushed back her chair abruptly and stood up.

"Excuse me," she whispered, bottom lip trembling, before bolting from the room, leaving a stunned and silent House.

* * *

Cameron ran to the bathroom, tears streaming down her face. She tried so hard not to let Amy get to her, but sometimes there was no way of stopping the old feelings of resentment and hatred from pouring through her. And now she'd humiliated herself in front of the one man she really cared for. Life just couldn't get any worse...

* * *

House, still feeling slightly stunned by his female subordinate's outburst, limped through to his office with the letter still in his hand. Sitting down, he picked up the phone and pressed speed dial 3.

"Hello, this is Dr Wilson, how can I help?" was the greeting from his best (well, only) friend.

"God, you sound like a 1950's secretary," said House in way of reply.

Wilson sighed.

"What do you want, House?"

"Cameron got a letter from her sister today, about her upcoming nuptials. Cut a long story short, her sister's a bitch and Cameron's crying in the bathroom 'cos she's going to have to face her family at the wedding alone."

"And... you care?" Wilson asked, not bothering to hide his surprise.

"What would you say," House continued, ignoring his friend's remark, "if I told you I was considering offering to be Cameron's...." he trailed off.

"What? Cameron's what?"

"Her.... date..." House finished.

Back in his office, Wilson stared wide-eyed at the phone.

"Wilson? Say something!" snapped House.

Shaking his head in an attempt to clear it, Wilson said, "Her date for what?"

"For the wedding, of course! I thought that much was obvious."

"Yeah, sorry, stupid question," replied Wilson sarcastically.

House sighed in irritation.

"Will you please say something helpful? You know I usually love to play state-the-obvious, but I'm really not in the mood."

"Well," Wilson said slowly, "I think it really depends on Cameron. But the fact that you're even contemplating about offering suggests that you-"

"I do not care about her Wilson, not in that sense, so don't start," House interrupted wearily.

Safe in the knowledge that his friend couldn't see it, Wilson let the huge grin spread over his face.

"Whatever you say, Greg. Anyway, I think it's a great idea."

"Thanks for the approval, _Jimmy_," House answered sarcastically. "Now go see to your sick bald kids. And you can wipe that smile off your face while you're at it."

"How did you-"spluttered Wilson, before he realised he was speaking to a dial tone.


	2. Amy calling

Chuckling to himself, House hung up the phone. Picking up his oversized tennis ball, he began to absently throw it from hand to hand, deep in contemplation. Had he meant what he'd said to Wilson? Did he really want to willingly subject himself to the horrors of a wedding, a wedding in which the bride was a cow and the groom was probably a spineless ass?

He was still thinking when he heard a phone ringing in the empty conference room. When it showed no signs of stopping, House sighed, heaved himself out of his chair and hobbled through the connecting door.

Cameron's phone was ringing inside her purse, and she was nowhere to be seen. House pulled it out; and he would have let it ring out, had it not been for the name he saw upon the screen.

_Amy calling...._

House smirked. He could not pass this opportunity up. He pressed the answer button, and slowly held the phone up to his ear.

"Allison? Sweetie-pie, it's Amy. Hello, can you hear me? Hellooo??"

The voice coming out of the phone was shrill and piercing.

Wincing, House replied, "Yes, I can hear you. I believe the dog from down the street is also aware of your dulcet tones."

After a short pause, Amy stated, "You're not Allison."

"Correct. Nothing gets past you, does it?" _God, how can Cameron have come from the same gene pool as this bozo?_ wondered House.

"Well, who the hell are you then? Don't tell me my workaholic big sister's gone and got herself a boyfriend?" Amy's mocking tone suggested that this would be impossible.

"Is that so hard to believe?" House enquired, his hackles rising on Cameron's behalf.

Amy giggled.

"Well, Allie's never been much fun. Far too into her studies, y'know? The one serious guy she went out with died, and now all she does is play about in chem. labs 'n' stuff, looks at bugs or something."

"I think the term you're looking for is 'immunologist'," said House coolly, "a hugely complicated job which your sister happens to be rather brilliant at."

Unbeknownst to House, Cameron had entered his office and was currently standing in the doorway to the conference room, listening to the conversation. When she heard his last comment, she felt a slight blush upon her cheeks and her stomach flipped over. His praise was something she rarely heard, and she treasured the few compliments he had given her. This was one of the best yet.

On the other end of the line, Amy repeated her earlier question.

"So who are you? Are you her boyfriend?"

House made his decision then and there.

"Yes. Yes, I am her boyfriend. My name is Greg House and I work in the same department as her, I'm a diagnostician. I happen to be rather brilliant myself. Allison's told me all about you - can't wait to meet you at the wedding."

At this statement, Cameron's jaw dropped.

Amy sounded amused.

"Right! Well, I guess we'll see you there, then. _If_ you are who you say you are, that is."

_How the hell does Cameron put up with this?_ House wondered. _I've only been talking to her for two minutes and I already want to strangle her._

"Oh, you'll definitely see me there," he stated smoothly. "Bye, Amy."

And with that, House hung up the phone. He stood up and turned around, triumphant, only to come face-to-face with a furious subordinate.

"How long have you been standing there?" he enquired, slightly sheepishly.

Cameron frowned.

"Oh, long enough to discover I've acquired a new boyfriend, and that he's planning to come with me to Amy's wedding. Jesus, House! What were you thinking?! Do you know how humiliating it's going to be for me to show up without a date now? I mean, it would've been bad enough before, but after that -"

"What if you didn't show up alone?" House interrupted.

"What are you on about?" she asked, exasperated.

House shifted from leg to leg, clearly uncomfortable.

"I mean, what if I did... You know... Go with you?"


	3. You and me?

Cameron stood still, stunned at her boss's last words.

"You're not serious?" she said finally.

"As an embolism," House joked.

"You... and me?"

"Why not?" House asked defensively.

"Why not? Because you're my boss, that's why not!" exclaimed Cameron.

House fixed his cool blue gaze on her.

"Didn't stop you from trying before."

Cameron reddened. Knowing he had made his point, House gave a self-satisfied smirk.

"Come on, Cameron! This could be so much fun! You get to get one over on your sister, and I get to mess with your sister's head. What could be a better way to spend your time?"

Despite her misgivings, Cameron couldn't help but laugh at the animated look on his face.

House grinned back at her.

"So? What do you say?"

Cameron bit her lip.

"No. No, we can't, it's crazy! I mean-"

Cameron was interrupted by her cell phone ringing once again. One quick look informed her that it was her sister.

"Hello?" she answered, a knot of dread forming in her stomach.

"Sweetie-pie _there_ you are! Where on earth have you been? I had to talk to the strangest man, Graham something-or-other, who claims to be your boyfriend! Isn't that just the funniest thing you ever heard?! I mean, it's ludicrous-"

"His name is Greg, Amy, and why may I ask is it so ludicrous to think he may be my boyfriend?" Cameron cut in, irritation slowly replacing the dread.

Amy was clearly taken aback.

"Well, honey, you've never mentioned a boyfriend before, I guess I just assumed..."

"Yeah, well you assumed wrong. Greg _is_ my boyfriend, we've been together for months. I was planning on introducing him to the family at some point, but work's been crazy," Cameron lied smoothly, hardly believing what she was doing. It didn't help that House was staring at her with his mouth hanging open in disbelief.

"Right! Wonderful news, sweetie-pie. We were beginning to worry you'd be alone forever! You are bringing him to the wedding, I hope? I know mom and dad would just _love_ to meet him."

Cameron could hear the smirk in her voice. Amy didn't believe her! _Cow_, she seethed.

"Um.... Yeah... I mean, yes. Yes, of course I'm bringing him to the wedding."

House's jaw was practically on the floor by now.

"Fabulous! See you there, then. Bye!"

After she hung up, Cameron slowly turned round to face her boss.

"If – and I mean _if_ – we do this, we have to do it right. It has to be believable. We'll have to-"

"Excuse me," House interrupted. "What happened to '_no we can't, it's crazy!'?"_

Cameron reddened.

"I don't know what came over me, to be honest. Amy always brings out my defensive side, so when she suggested that the idea of me having a man in my life was 'ludicrous' I just kinda.... snapped..."

"Clearly," House replied drily.

"Hey, you started it! If you hadn't said anything, this would never have happened."

"Yeah, well. She brings out my defensive side too, I suppose."

They shared a smile.

"So, how do we make it believable?" House enquired with interest.

"You... You mean you still want to come with me?" Cameron asked, her voice filled with disbelief.

"I said I would, didn't I?" House said, eyebrows raised. "What exactly did you have in mind?"

Cameron began to pace the room.

"You told Amy you were my boyfriend, and I think it's safe to say she wasn't entirely convinced."

"True. Your sister seems to be under the impression that you're far too busy to be romantically involved with anyone."

"Yeah, well, she's not entirely wrong," Cameron sighed. "Anyway, if we're going to convince her, we're going to have to appear to be a proper couple."

Despite himself, House felt his heart give a little jump. He put it down to the thrill of irritating Amy, whom he genuinely disliked, as opposed to the idea that acting like Cameron's boyfriend wouldn't necessarily be an unpleasant experience.

"Couldn't agree more," he said breezily. "It has to be authentic."

Cameron's heart gave a little flutter of its own. Unlike House, however, she knew it was entirely due to the pleasurable idea of spending time with her boss, doing couple-type things, even if she knew it would only be a game.

Plus, messing with Amy's head was always fun.


	4. Operation Confetti

**Chapter four - hope you like it! I don't own any of these fabulous characters, but I reserve the right to make them say whatever I want and do whatever I tell them to do! **

Cameron couldn't quite believe what she was doing.

It was Friday evening, and she was heading over to her boss's house to fabricate their history as a couple. Despite herself, Cameron let out a little snort of laughter. It sounded ridiculous even in her head!

Since her conversation with Amy two days ago, Cameron had been going over and over the situation in her head, often reaching the conclusion that she was indeed crazy. She had nearly called the whole thing off so many times, but when House had paged her this morning with the direct message of "operation confetti begins tonight at my place, 8pm – bring food," she found to her surprise that she didn't want to call it off. So, after work, she had driven to the store and picked up chips, popcorn, a frozen pizza and a bumper bag of sweets and, with a thrill of apprehension, was now driving towards House.

Bringing her car to a stop fifteen minutes later, Cameron switched off the engine and stared at House's condo. "Here we go then," she whispered to herself with a grin. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and slid out onto the pavement. Lifting the grocery bags into her arms, she walked up to the front door and rang the bell.

"It's open!" a voice yelled from inside. "Don't make the cripple walk all the way over to the door just for the sake of manners!"

Rolling her eyes, Cameron used her elbow to push down on the handle and, with a swift kick to the door, walked into the inner sanctum of her boss. She drank in the scene before her – shelves filled with books, many of them medical texts; the piano in the corner; the surprising lack of mess. The television was playing away to itself, Spongebob Squarepants being the programme of choice.

"Well it's about time you got here, I'm starving!" greeted a scowling House, who was lounging on the sofa. "What did you bring me to eat, then?"

"You watch Spongebob?" was Cameron's incredulous response.

"Spongebob Squarepants, I'll have you know, is a fantastic display of animation that delves deeper into the realms of fantasy than even Spielberg would dare to go." House grinned. "Plus, it cracks me up."

"Uh huh," said Cameron wryly, but she couldn't prevent the smile tugging at her face.

"Anyway, what food did you bring?" House asked again. "I really am starving."

Dumping the bags on the kitchen counter, Cameron pulled out the pizza box and waved it in the air.

"Topping?" he inquired with some suspicion. "It better not be anything girly – I only eat manly pizza."

Cameron raised an eyebrow. "What exactly is a manly pizza when it's at home?"

There was a pause while House gave the matter some thought.

"Anything with more meat than cheese I guess, and eye-watering hot sauce."

"Good thing I bought an extra large Meat Feast and a bottle of Tabasco, then," she grinned.

House grunted his approval. "Well, get it in the oven already, girl, your boyfriend needs sustenance!"

A blush stained Cameron's cheeks in spite of herself at the mention of "boyfriend".

House smirked. "I know I'm pretty irresistible, but if you want our story to be believable, you might want to stop doing that."

Cameron glared at him. "You are nothing close to irresistible, _Greg._"

"Keep telling yourself that, _Allison_."

Rolling her eyes, she switched the oven on and ripped open the box. House gave a quiet chuckle to himself and turned his attention back to the underwater antics of Spongebob.

* * *

One hour and half a pizza later, Cameron was beginning to relax.

"So – 'Operation Confetti'?"

House glanced up from his partially-devoured pizza slice.

"Well, every covert operation needs a name; I did toy with the idea of 'Operation Amy-Cameron's-a- pain-in-my-crippled-ass' but it was a bit long-winded. Operation Confetti has a better ring to it, don't you think?"

"That's my sister you're talking about," said Cameron, but her eyes were full of laughter.

"What's your point?" House joked back.

Cameron giggled. _Giggling?! _She groaned inwardly. _I'm getting too comfortable. Stick to the plan!_

She cleared her throat. "Right, let's get started."

House watched with unconcealed amusement as Cameron pulled a notepad and pen out of her bag and wrote at the top of the page in her neatest writing, 'Our History', before glancing up at him expectantly.

"I'm sorry, are we going to be tested on this later?" he smirked.

"What?" Cameron replied defensively. "I just thought it would be a good idea to keep track of everything."

"God, I bet you were queen of the swots in high school."

"Oh yeah? Well I bet you were king of the jocks," she shot back.

"Oh dear, is that the best comeback you can come up with?" House replied snidely. "I'm clearly not with you for your sparkling wit."

"No," she retorted, "you're with me for my hot ass and sexual prowess!"

House whistled appreciatively, and yet another blush crept up Cameron's face as she realised what she'd just said.

Pushing her hair out of her face, she pleaded, "Can we please just start planning?"

House grinned at her discomfort, but uncharacteristically refrained from teasing her any further.

"Look, what is there to plan really?" he said. "We obviously met at work right?"

"Well, obviously."

"So we met at work, I overwhelmed you with my devilishly handsome good looks and seduced you into bed three months ago, and you've been in love with me ever since. You haven't introduced me to the folks yet because you wanted them to meet me face to face, but work's been too hectic up til now for us to visit. We both decided the wedding would be the perfect opportunity for everyone to meet me, and for Amy to eat her words. We'll parade in front of her and the new hubby, steal her thunder and piss her off as much as humanly possible, then at some point in the future you can casually mention we've broken up and things will be as they are now." He shrugged. "I really don't see a problem."

Cameron stared at him, jaw slightly ajar.

House raised his eyebrows. "Do you see a problem?"

"N-no," she stuttered. "I guess not."

"That's sorted, then. Did I happen to spy a bumper bag of sweets over there?"

Cameron chucked the bag over without a word.

"Excellent." He tore open a bag of jelly beans and emptied it into his mouth.

Cameron shook her head, smiling.

Lifting up the TV remote and pointing it at the screen, House turned towards Cameron.

"So - have you ever watched the dramatic brilliance of a little show called 'The L Word'?"

* * *

Leaving the condo a couple of hours later, Cameron slid into her car feeling slightly bemused. Her evening of planning had turned into TV fest, slumped on the sofa with House eating junk food. She couldn't remember the last time she'd watched that much TV in one night, or the last time she'd laughed so much.

Sliding the key into the ignition, she smiled as she admitted to herself that it had been the best night she'd had in ages, not knowing that, inside the condo, House was thinking the exact same thing.

**Thank you so much for the reviews - it makes me ridiculously happy reading them! **


	5. Wilson's a Girl

**Hey! This is a really short chapter, for which I am really sorry, but I promise to write more as soon as I can. I own none of these characters.**

"What the hell are you playing at?" demanded Princeton Plainsboro's Dean of Medicine, barging into House's office.

House didn't raise his eyes from his Nintendo DS.

"Mario Cart," he replied, his thumbs pumping away. "I just bio-bombed the blonde princess. You know, the one who squeals like a girl every time something-"

"I didn't mean what game are you playing," Cuddy interrupted exasperatedly. "What I meant was why the hell are you taking the _exact_ same period of time off as Cameron next month? This department can't run with only two doctors!"

House paused his game and turned to face the Dean.

"Are you insinuating that Foreman and the Wombat are incapable of managing without me?" he asked, with the look of one who has been deeply offended. "Honestly Cuddy, I thought you had more faith in my ducklings!"

She sighed loudly.

"I do have faith in them, but you can't expect them to manage the workload of four doctors. Can't you take your vacation days at some other time?"

"Sorry," House replied breezily, "no can do." When he saw she was still glaring at him, he rolled his eyes.

"Relax, Cuddles! It's only for four days. The department will not fall apart in four days but, if for some reason it does, I give you full permission to punish the boys. I know you've been _dying_ to use that new whip."

"If anything does go wrong House," she retorted, "it's you who's going to be punished."

A look of amusement passed over House's face as he watched his boss flounce out of his office and straight into Wilson. She ignored the oncologist's apologies and stormed off down the hall, steam practically escaping from her ears.

"What was that about?" asked a bemused Wilson.

House smirked at his friend.

"Oh, nothing. Cuddy's just getting her panties in a twist for no reason whatsoever, same as usual."

Wilson snorted.

"Yeah right. With you, there's always a reason."

"You wound me, Jimmy," House whispered, wiping away an imaginary tear.

Wilson just rolled his eyes and looked at his friend, determined to get an explanation.

Realising he wasn't going to get any peace until Wilson was satisfied, House sighed with annoyance and said, "Cuddy's just getting herself into an unnecessary panic over next month's work rota; we'll be down to two doctors for a few days, and she's convinced that the whole department's going to spontaneously combust, or something equally dramatic."

Wilson frowned.

"Two doctors? Where are the other two going?"

House picked up his DS and resumed his game. Over the noise he replied, "Well, Cameron's got her sister's wedding to go to."

"Okay, so that explains where one of them will be. Who else won't be here?"

House ignored him, but began to look slightly uncomfortable.

Wilson stared at him in confusion; then, as realisation dawned, he began to grin.

"Oh my god. _You're_ the other doctor! You're going with Cameron to the wedding!"

"You sound like a teenage girl at a sleepover," House sneered, resorting to insults to hide his growing discomfort.

"I thought I was a 1950s secretary?" Wilson replied drily.

"Yeah, well... That's what you'll grow up to be. Right now, you're an irritating, gossiping teenager."

"I can't believe you actually volunteered to do something nice!" Wilson continued, deciding to ignore the last comment.

"Why are you so surprised? I told you I was thinking about it."

Wilson raised his eyebrows.

"Well yeah, but I didn't think you'd actually go through with it. Don't get me wrong though," he added hastily, "I think it's great."

"And we all know how much I value your approval," House said sarcastically.

Wilson just continued to grin.

"You can be as sarcastic and snarky as you want, House, but this just proves my point. You _like_ her, don't you?"

"Oh, change the record Jimmy." House glared at his friend. "Don't you have work to do?"

Wilson rolled his eyes and laughed, but obediently turned around and left the office, leaving his best friend to fume in peace.

**So there you have it - told you it was short! I hate to make excuses, but I have been really busy with midterms recently. I promise to write more soon!**


	6. The Black Sheep

**This is a longer chapter - hope you all like it! Thank you once again for all the amazing reviews!**

Time appeared to fly by for Cameron; kept busy with baffling cases, she was shocked to realise one afternoon, sitting at her desk, that there were only three days left before she and House had to travel to Hartford, Connecticut for the four-day marathon that was her sister's wedding.

_Four days!_ She groaned inwardly. _Putting up with Amy for one day is enough to drive me crazy._

It had been decided that she and House would fly to Connecticut (first class of course, at House's insistence) – the return flight would give them the perfect excuse to leave bright and early the day after the wedding. Just thinking about going home was enough to fill Cameron's stomach with dread.

Though she was nervous about having to keep up the boyfriend pretence for four days in front of her family, it wasn't the only cause of her anxiety. She could feel one of the most unpleasant experiences of her past creeping into her memory and, knowing she wouldn't be able to ignore it, she closed her eyes and let it wash over her...

"_You are the most ungrateful child I have ever met, Allison Cameron," cried her mother. "You know it's your sister's big dance recital this afternoon. She's been working so hard, we can't let her down."_

_The eighteen-year-old Allison bit her lip to keep from crying._

"_But Mom, I told you about this interview months ago! If I don't go, they won't even consider me for their school."_

_Joanne Cameron glared at her daughter._

"_So choose a different school."_

"_It's the most prestigious medical school in the country!" cried Allison in despair. "Do you know how lucky I am to even get an _interview_? They have the best reputation – their graduates are practically guaranteed jobs in hospitals all over the world! If I don't go to this interview, it could put my whole future career in jeopardy."_

_Joanne stared at her with cold eyes._

"_And if you _go_ to this interview, you'll be putting your sister's happiness in jeopardy. I cannot believe you are being so selfish. Besides, you know how I feel about you going to medical school. Maybe this is just the opportunity you need to change your major to something more suitable for a young woman."_

_Allison's face whitened in anger._

"_I am not having this argument with you again, Mom. Medicine is all I've ever wanted to do with my life – you KNOW that! And I am going to my interview whether you support me or not."_

_She turned on her heel, grabbed her purse and marched out the front door, determined to keep the tears from falling until she was as far away from her family as possible..._

The sudden ringing of her phone jolted Cameron out of her past. One glance at the screen was enough to send a huge smile all over her face.

"Nick!" she answered joyfully. "How are you?"

"I'm good, sis, how are you?" replied Nicholas Cameron, eldest of the Cameron siblings and beloved brother of Dr Cameron.

"All the better for hearing from you. Why has it taken you so long to phone me?" demanded Cameron.

"Sorry Allie, I was stuck in the desert for two weeks filming one damn scene. My lead actress is one hell of a diva – she kept complaining of heatstroke and refusing to come out of her trailer for any longer than half an hour at a time."

"Aw, the hardships of being a top director," teased Cameron.

"Yeah, yeah," Nick said wryly. "So how's the doctoring going?"

"It's good, thanks..." Cameron's voice trailed off.

"Allie? Are you okay?" Nick asked with concern. "You usually talk about work for at least twenty minutes when I call, and now all I get is '_it's good, thanks'_?"

Cameron laughed.

"I'm fine Nick, honestly. I'm just a little nervous about coming home."

"I know, babe. It's been a while." Nick sighed. "But Mom will probably leave you in peace - I'll be there, so no doubt most of her energy will go towards lecturing me about my lack of a wife," he joked.

Cameron grinned.

"You're probably right. A thirty-something unmarried son is a far bigger problem than a career-orientated daughter."

Glancing up, she saw House out in the corridor, about to enter the conference room. As he pushed open the door, she said hurriedly, "Nick, my boss is here. I'll call you back later tonight."

"No problem, Allie. Love you."

Cameron smiled with affection.

"Love you too. Bye!"

Hearing the tail-end of Cameron's conversation, House felt the stirrings of an emotion he hadn't felt in a long time. He refused to acknowledge it, but the jealousy was still there, taunting him from afar.

"Is that my competition?" he asked, turning on the puppy-dog eyes. "Geez Cameron, I know we never said we were exclusive, but I thought you loved me! I feel so betrayed," he whispered with an exaggerated pout.

Cameron rolled her eyes.

"That was my brother, House."

Annoyed with the quick burst of relief that flowed through him at her response, House resorted as usual to sarcasm.

"Your brother? Has Amy finally had that sex change then? Can't say I'm too surprised."

Cameron couldn't help but laugh.

"No, Amy has not had a sex change. Did I never tell you I had a brother?"

"I never knew you had a _sister_ until last month. You've never told me about your family full stop. To be fair I never asked, but hey..."

Cameron rolled her eyes again – she seemed to do that a lot around him.

"Well, now you know. I have an elder brother called Nick, as well as a little sister called Amy."

House sat down at the table, easing the pain in his leg.

"So what do they do?"

Cameron looked taken aback at his interest.

"Since when do you like talking about personal stuff?"

House shrugged.

"I figured I better know at least some of your family background if our story's going to be believable." This was only half true – a big part of him was just curious to find out more about her life outside of work.

Cameron raised her eyebrows.

"Okay... Well, Nick's a film director. He mainly does high budget movies to pay for his extortionate mortgage, but he likes to direct quirky independent films best. He's really great at his job."

House couldn't help but smile at her obvious pride in her brother.

"And Amy?" he prompted. "What does she do, aside from making other people's lives a little more miserable?"

"Amy has an art degree. Her paintings are actually pretty good, but she has no interest in making a career out of it. Her main goal in life has always been to marry a rich man and become a lady of leisure," she sighed mockingly, with a fluttering of her eyelashes.

House snorted.

"Your parents must be so proud of her."

He watched in fascination as Cameron's smile stiffened.

"Oh, they are. Well, my mom is at least. Dad just wants her to be happy."

Pulling a patient's file towards her, she held it in front of her face and tried to concentrate on his latest results. Her concentration was broken as House hooked his cane over the top of the file and pulled it down, revealing her face.

"She must be proud of you too, though, right? Medical stuff is _way_ harder than painting, after all."

Cameron's smile didn't reach her eyes.

"She's proud to some extent; but she's never supported my decision to become a doctor. It's not a very ladylike job, you know."

House raised an eyebrow.

"So she'd rather have you waste your brain and become a Stepford wife?"

"Yup. She's very old-fashioned in that respect. In her opinion, the perfect daughter would marry young to a wealthy man and become a good little wife in the suburbs with 2.5 children, devoting her spare time to respectable charity work." Cameron tried to keep her voice light, but House could hear the strain. "You can see how my choices were a bit of a disappointment to her."

Once again House felt anger towards a member of Cameron's family.

Noticing the frown, Cameron smiled at him.

"Don't worry about it – it's just the way she is. Nick's been a bit of a disappointment as well – he's successful, handsome and rich, but still unmarried. And he's _thirty-seven_."

House laughed at the mock horror in her voice.

Cameron grinned back at him, relieved that the tension had lifted.

"I must say, I'm quite looking forward to meeting your family," House admitted slyly. "You seem to be an interesting bunch."

"Oh yeah," Cameron joked wryly. "We're a hoot." Pushing back her chair, she added, "I'm going to go check on our patient. See you later."

As he watched her leave, House drummed his fingers on the table thoughtfully.

_Yes, _he mused. _Meeting the Cameron clan was certainly going to be an experience..._

**Okay, so it's still not a chapter of epic length, but it's definitely longer! I haven't written chapter seven yet, but I'm fairly certain aout where it's going so it shouldn't take too long.**


	7. The curious case of Allison Cameron

_Ring-ring! _

House opened one bleary eye, a disgruntled moan escaping his lips.

_Ring-ring!_

Refusing to lift his head off of the pillow, House blindly waved his hand in the direction of his bedside table, searching for the phone.

_Ring-ring!_

Finally locating the source of irritation that had disturbed his sleep, House answered the phone with an incoherent grunt.

"House, you had better be up, dressed and ready to leave in five minutes!" replied a stern-sounding female.

House drew his eyebrows together in confusion, still drugged with sleep.

"Mom?" he asked, his voice tinged with disbelief.

The woman on the other end of the line snorted with amusement.

"Well, that sure gives me an insight into your childhood."

"Who is this, and why are you phoning me at such a god-awful time? It's the middle of the night!"

"It's Cameron, and it's not the middle of the night – it's seven-thirty, and we have to check in at the airport in less than an hour!"

House squinted at his watch. Sure enough, the big hand was at the six and the little hand was at the seven – a position he normally only saw in the evenings before his nightly dose of Spongebob. That such a time could exist in the morning was unthinkable.

"House!" yelled Cameron, causing him to wince. "I will be outside your front door in four minutes – get your ass in gear!"

"You are one bossy girlfriend," he complained. "My other girlfriends are way nicer than you."

Cameron snorted again.

"House, I don't think prostitutes count as girlfriends. They're only nice to you cos you're paying them to be."

"That was _harsh_, Allison. What are your parents going to think if you talk to me like that?"

Cameron rolled her eyes at the phone.

"You're down to nearly three minutes. Hurry up!"

"Well if you'd get off the..." House stopped when he realised he was talking to a dial tone.

* * *

Cameron sat in her car outside of House's condo, tapping her fingers agitatedly on the steering wheel. She checked the clock on the dashboard for what felt like the hundredth time. _7:45am._

"That's it," she muttered, climbing out of the car and slamming the door. She marched up the path to House's front door intending to knock it down, when suddenly it sprang open to reveal her boss's grumpy face.

"I hope you know," he said slowly, "that this is a time that should never have to be seen by people as special as myself."

"Is that right?" she smirked, taking his bag from him and walking back to the car.

House followed her.

"Yes, that is right. It is an unnatural hour usually only seen by goody two-shoes like yourself. You know, people who just _love_ to show off by arriving early for work, all bright-eyed and eager like a beaver."

Cameron looked at him strangely.

"Are you okay? You're not making much sense."

House glared at her.

"Of _course_ I'm not making sense – I should still be asleep!"

"Oh, stop your whining!" she teased. "You can sleep on the plane. Now, get in so we can go already!"

House manoeuvred himself into the passenger seat with much grumbling and muttering. Cameron by contrast slid into her seat with a bit of a bounce. She started the engine and drove off quickly, with House muttering something about beavers again. Cameron just laughed, and hummed along to a song on the radio.

Five minutes down the road, House turned to look at her suspiciously.

"You seem very excited about this trip all of a sudden. Should I be worried?"

Cameron smiled.

"I'm not excited about going to the wedding. But it's been ages since I saw Nick! I'm looking forward to catching up with him."

House filed this away with the rest of the information he had on the Cameron family.

"You're close to your brother, then?"

Cameron nodded.

"Always have been. He took care of me a lot when we were growing up."

"Isn't that what parents are for?" House inquired, his curiosity burning. He didn't know why, but for some reason he always wanted to know more about Allison Cameron; he wanted to learn about her life not, as with most of the people he encountered, to use for future manipulation but simply to understand her better. Most unusual...

"Usually," Cameron replied, "but when Amy arrived she took up a lot of their time."

"She was a pain in the ass from _birth_?" House was incredulous.

Cameron laughed.

"Not exactly. Amy was born seven weeks prematurely. Her lungs collapsed a couple of times; it was touch-and-go for a while. Mom and Dad were at the hospital almost all of the time – perfectly understandable, seeing as they knew each time they saw her could be the last. Nick was fifteen, so they felt comfortable leaving him in charge of me."

"How old were you?" House asked.

"I was ten."

House raised an eyebrow.

"That's a pretty big age gap between you and your sister."

Cameron grinned impishly.

"Yeah well, from what I gathered she wasn't exactly planned. My parents described her as a 'wonderful surprise'..."

House snorted.

"Now there's a euphemism for 'the horrific by-product of a drunken night of nooky' if ever I heard one."

Cameron just smiled and shook her head.

House glanced sideways at her.

"So, it was just you and Nick for a while then? All alone, left to fend for yourselves..."

"Jeez House, you make it sound like we were abandoned!" replied Cameron, rolling her eyes. "It wasn't like that."

"Well, what was it like?" House demanded.

Cameron sighed; she pondered the idea of just ignoring him, but that method had never worked before. Besides, a part of her liked the idea of him knowing about her past. It would make them more like friends rather than colleagues, and that was a prospect she found rather appealing.

"Well, Mom and Dad spent their time at the hospital during the day. Nick would meet me after school and we'd walk home, do our homework, watch tv – you know, normal stuff. Our parents would be home in time to make us dinner and eat with us, catch up on how our day had been; then they'd take us to see Amy for a little while, drive us home and we'd all go to bed. In the mornings they would have breakfast with us and see us off to school, then Mom would head over to the hospital; Dad worked in the mornings then joined Mom and Amy in the afternoons. After school the neighbours would take it in turns to pop in, check we were okay, but most of the time it was just me and my brother. We got really close – sure, we drove each other nuts sometimes, but when it came down to it we were best friends. When Amy eventually came home she still needed a lot of attention, so the dynamics didn't really change – me and Nick were a team. And it's been that way ever since," she concluded with a smile. "Is your curiosity satisfied now?"

"When has my curiosity _ever_ been satisfied?" House replied teasingly. "I'm sure there are a million personal, prying questions I could think of to ask you if I put my mind to it."

Cameron grinned.

"Well, we're here now so you'll just have to contain yourself 'til we're on the plane."

She pulled into the airport and went to head over to the multi-storey car park when House reached over and pulled the steering wheel in the opposite direction.

"Hey!" she exclaimed crossly. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Just keep driving straight. I happen to have in my possession a magical ticket that will allow us to park within a stone's throw of the mystical building of metal birds. All you have to do is park on top of one of the little stick men in wheelchairs."

Cameron's conscience was throwing a hissy fit.

"But... I'm the driver, and I'm not disabled. I shouldn't really park there."

House sighed. That insane moral compass of hers was a constant source of irritation.

"You may not be bothered by the hundreds of miles we'd have to walk from the car to the plane if we parked over there, but I am." He clasped her hand and widened his eyes beseechingly. "Would you inflict added pain on an already-agonised defenceless cripple?"

Cameron snorted at the term 'defenceless', but House noticed with satisfaction that her caring nature had won out. She drove forwards and parked in one of the disabled bays. House smirked, reached into his coat pocket, pulled out the distinctive blue sign and hung it on the rear-view mirror. Cameron, meanwhile, was trying to erase the memory of the electricity she had felt when House had taken her hand. _Pathetic,_ she swore internally. _That's what you are, Allison Cameron; pathetic. He's your boss, for heavens sake! _Still, it took some effort to shake off the feeling. She couldn't quite believe the effect his simple touch could have on her. Imagine what could happen if...

Mentally giving herself a slap, Cameron climbed out of the car and retrieved their luggage from the trunk. Along with House's duffell bag, there was her small travelling case and her dress bag to juggle with.

"Right, let's go!" she said, with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.

"Absolutely," House enthused. "I can't wait to get on the plane."

Cameron's curiosity was automatically aroused.

"Why?" She asked suspiciously. "You can't seriously be looking forward to the wedding?"

House gave a derisive laugh.

"Don't be stupid, Allison. No, I want to get on the plane because I've thought of at least twenty more questions I want to ask."

Cameron gaped at him.

"What?" he asked with mock defence. "You said I had to contain my curisoty unil we were on the plane."

"Yes," she spluttered, "but I didn't mean-"

"Therefore," House continued, as though she hadn't said a word,"I am going to pry into your personal life so much that you'll wish to God you'd decided to turn up at the wedding a poor, just waiting to be mocked singleton."

And with that he shot her a bordering-on-evil grin and hobbled ahead of her, leaving her to struggle alone with the luggage with a growing sense of dread. It was going to be a very long flight...


	8. Snarks on a Plane

**A/N: I'm _so_ sorry for the epic length of time I took to update. I have been really busy with finals and trying to arrange my dissertation stuff for next year. I hope you guys don't hate me too much, and that this chapter meets your approval. Please review! **

House waited until the plane was up in the air and on its way to Connecticut before he began his barrage of questions.

"So... I get that Amy would have needed the full attention of your parents when she first came out of the hospital. A cynical bastard I may be, but even I understand that they might have been a little over-protective of her. But what I want to know is, just how much did they overlook you?"

Cameron, meeting his gaze as coolly as she could, replied, "What on earth makes you think I was overlooked?"

"Oh, please," House snorted. "If Amy is the stereotypical spoilt baby, _you_ are the stereotypical middle child. Just a shot in the dark here, but I'd bet Wilson's salary that big brother, being the eldest and successful to boot, can do no wrong in the eyes of your parents; and we've already established that fragile little Amy is the apple of Mommy's eye."

Cameron glared at him, but said nothing to discredit his theory. On the contrary, she shifted uncomfortably in her chair and folded her arms as though to protect herself from an age-old ache. House noted every action, and felt secure enough in his theory to continue.

"So, young Allison has to work three times as hard to receive parental praise. Getting reasonable grades isn't good enough, so you study even harder and get straight A's. You came second in sports? Not impressive enough - so next time you come first. Am I right?"

Cameron turned towards him in surprise.

"What makes you think I competed in sports?"

House sighed theatrically.

"Have you not been listening? You're the middle child – that means competitive by nature. Plus," he leered, "that hot body had to come from somewhere."

She shook her head, a small smile of amusement playing on her lips.

"So?" House prompted. "Am I right?"

Cameron fidgeted again. Her childhood, while not exactly miserable, was not something she cared to relive. She had never been a selfish child; on the contrary, when Amy had been born she had been thrilled at the thought of having a little sister. And she had been old enough to understand that Amy had been ill and therefore needed a lot of attention from her parents. However, it felt that everything she had achieved while growing up had been overshadowed by something Amy-related. It was often silly things, like the day she came home with her first 'A' only to discover that Amy had said her first word, a far bigger accomplishment. But there were times when the overshadowing hurt; her parents missed her soccer final because Amy had developed a cold and they didn't want to leave her alone in case it spread to her lungs. Cameron had smiled and said it didn't matter, that there would be other games, but it had stung that both her parents had chosen to stay with Amy. Nick had been there to support her though, and he more than made up for her lack of parental support.

House nudged her, still waiting for her answer.

Cameron rolled her eyes and grinned at the expectant look on his face.

"Yes you're right; are you happy now?"

House smirked in triumph.

"I played soccer for six years, and I was on the high school gymnastics team. My parents didn't ignore me, but I did feel that, to get their attention, I had to excel at everything I did. Even then, it wasn't always enough," she added, slightly bitterly.

House frowned slightly, concerned at his immunologist's unusually-low attitude.

"How do you mean, it wasn't enough?"

Cameron looked down and fiddled with the earphones sitting on her lap.

"I mean... Take my first gymnastics competition. Amy had a dance competition on the same day, so Mom went to hers and Dad came to mine. That's fair enough, I was happy just to have him and Nick there. I had been training really hard on the uneven bars and my floor routine, and it paid off – I came first on the bars and second on the floor. Afterwards, we met Mom and Amy for dinner, to celebrate, and Mom told us that Amy had come third in her section. We all congratulated her, and then Nick told Mom how I'd done and she congratulated me."

House raised an eyebrow.

"I fail to see the problem, here."

Cameron glanced up for a second, before returning her attention to the earphones.

"She said well done, but then she threw her arms around Amy and gushed that Amy's win had been such a big achievement for her; she was the youngest in her class, she wasn't as strong as the rest... She was proud of me, but I was older and stronger, so my winning was kind of expected. Then she added that maybe, next time, I could try harder and come first in floor as well."

House felt a rush of sympathy for the young girl Cameron had been; trying so hard all the time to attract the parental spotlight towards her for just a second, and not getting it even when her achievements were immense. He could just picture her sitting in that restaurant, her elation from her victory ebbing away after her parents' reaction. _No_, he amended, _not her parents' reaction; just her Mom's._

"So what happened then?" he asked, though he suspected he could guess the answer.

Cameron smiled ruefully.

"What do you think happened? I doubled my training hours and came first in floor in the next competition. I was permanently exhausted and my schoolwork suffered, but it would be worth it if it made my mom proud of me."

"And did it?"

Cameron laughed without humour.

"I got lectured for allowing my grades to slip, and she threatened to pull me off the team unless I could get the balance right. Of course," she continued immediately, "she was only looking out for my best interests. It wasn't her fault I was so desperate to impress her."

A small spark of anger lit up House's blue eyes. Cameron's constant need to see the good in people was something that irritated him regularly; he was perfectly at ease in seeing them as the flawed, selfish liars that the majority of them were. Mrs Cameron seemed to fit his preconception just perfectly.

"If you ask me, Cameron, your mom's a bitch," House stated with typical bluntness, causing Cameron's eyes to flash with anger.

"I don't believe I did ask you, House. Besides, she wasn't like that all the time. As I got older, we were better; things were pretty good."

House, unable to let it drop, sniped, "Yeah, until you told her of your med school dreams and she flipped out all over again. From what you've told me, it seems like your mom is happy when you're doing what she wants you to do, but as soon as you try to break out of her life-plan for you she doesn't want to know. I bet she'd have preferred it if you had been a cheerleader rather than a soccer player, wouldn't she?"

Cameron said nothing, but her expression said it all. House smirked with the pleasure of being right. Again.

"And yet," he continued, his tone slightly puzzled, "you _were_ a soccer player, and you _did_ go to med school."

Cameron raised her eyebrows and replied sarcastically, "That's right, House. And people say you don't pay attention."

Scowling, House said, "What I meant was that, despite trying desperately to please her sometimes, you don't always do what Mommy wants you to do. That doesn't fit in with my theory at all."

He sounded so put out that Cameron had to laugh.

"Yes, I did want to please her. But I knew what I wanted, and when I _really_ want something, nothing anyone does or says will stop me. Plus, Nick was always there to encourage me; he supported me all the way."

Cameron's description of herself intrigued House; he had always seen her as the quiet, go-with-the-flow type. He found it very interesting to learn that she was quite capable of standing her ground. As he pictured her facing off to her mother, fighting for what she wanted, he couldn't help the feelings of grudging respect that rose within him.

"Your mom sounds like quite the woman. I'm looking forward to meeting the woman who spawned the director, the duckling _and_ the devil-child." House grinned to lighten the snark.

Cameron laughed, trying to picture what her mom would make of her "boyfriend". He was intelligent and world-renowned, which would stand in his favour, but he was also rude to the point of obnoxious. The more she thought about it, the more concerned she grew. While she and her mother may not have had the happiest of histories, she wanted to get on with her this weekend.

"House," she asked nervously, "you are going to behave yourself this weekend, aren't you?"

House raised an eyebrow.

"Behave myself? Cameron when have I _ever_ behaved myself? I don't remember seeing the clause in our contract that stated I had to act like Wilson. And believe me, I would never have signed it if there was one. You don't need to send yourself into a girly panic though; I shall be my usual charming self _all_ weekend."

"That's what I'm afraid of," said Cameron drily. "Could you maybe be a little less than your usual, and I use the word sparingly, _charming_ self in front of my family?"

"But honey," House whined, "I thought you loved me just the way I am?"

"Oh, I do _baby_," Cameron replied sweetly, "But I've had years to grow used to your bull; my family only has a couple of days. So try to be less of the ass you usually are, okay?"

And with that, she pulled on her headphones and closed her eyes, a small smirk playing on her lips.

House looked at her, trying to think of a clever retort. When none came readily to mind, he too pulled on his headphones. Glancing over at the smiling brunette beside him, he allowed himself to grin a little at the changes he was seeing in her. When she first started to work with him, she would have never dared to come out with such a speech. He didn't know what was causing the changes, but he had to admit he like it.

_If this is the real Alison Cameron_ he thought, _then this trip has just got a hell of a lot more interesting..._

**A/N: So what did you think? I hope you like it! Review if you did!**


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